The IT version of the simplified Bhagavad Gita
The other day I received a text with the simplified version of Bhagavad Gita. I have always been a fan of The Gita and like always, hoped that the text would be an eye opener and take me to another plane of inner peace. However as I moved from one slide to another, my brain, whose neural roots of logic are now compromised after a decade in the IT industry, was interpreting the verses as something that my manager would tell me. As the door of the elevator opened to my floor, there he was, my 5’10 manager in front of me with a crown on his head highlighted by a peacock feather, a blue tinge to his skin, a spinning ‘chakra’ on his right index finger and a flute in his left hand.
[ Italic font is the original verse from The Gita. The normal font is the version of Lord Krishna’s reincarnation as my manager.]
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“Why do you worry without cause? Whom do you fear without reason? Who can kill you? The soul is neither born nor does it die. Whatever happened, happened for the good. Whatever is happening is happening for the good. Whatever will happen, will also happen for the good only.”
Why do you write documentation with no use and impacting delivery? Who adds business value with documentation? What are you trying to clarify ? The documentation you wrote, was not read by anyone. The documentation you are writing now, isn’t being read by anyone. The documentation you will write, will also not be read by anyone.
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“You need not have any regrets for the past. You need not worry for the future. The present is happening. What did you lose that you cry about ? What did you bring with you, which you think you have lost ?”
You need not regret that you learnt nothing in the last project. You need not worry about your learning curve in the future. It is the current project that is happening. What did you lose that you cry about? What expertise did you bring with you, which you think you have lost ?
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“What did you produce which you think got destroyed? You did not bring anything, whatever you have, you received from here. Whatever you have given, you have given only here. Whatever you took, you took from god. Whatever you gave, you gave to him. You came empty handed, you will leave empty handed.”
What is the piece of code you wrote that you think got obsoleted? You did not bring anything. Whatever perks you have, you received from here. Whatever health you have given, you have given only here. Whatever you took is seen by the man above via the cctv. Whatever you gave is nothing but empty promises. You came with almost no hike, you will leave with no hike.
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“What is yours today, belonged to someone else yesterday, and will belong to someone else the day after tomorrow. You are mistakenly enjoying the thought that this is yours. It is this false happiness that is the cause of your sorrows.”
The code that you own today, belonged to someone else yesterday and will belong to someone else the day after tomorrow. You are mistakenly proud of the thought that this design is yours. It is this false pride that is the cause of your sorrows.
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“Change is the law of the universe. What you think of as death, is indeed life. In one instance you can be a millionaire, and in the other instance you can be steeped in poverty.”
Refactoring is the law of the universe. What you think of unnecessary, is indeed adding value to the business. In one instance you can be bug free, and in other instance you can crash the system.
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“Yours and mine, big & small erase these ideas from your mind. Then everything is yours and you belong to everyone. This body is not yours, neither are you of the body. The body is made of fire, water, air, earth and ether, and will disappear into these elements. But the soul is permanent — so who are you?”
Your design and mine, critical bug and minor bug erase these ideas from your mind. Then every bug is yours and every idea of yours belongs to everyone. This project is not yours, neither are you of the project. This project is made of buggy code, improper requirement definition, code smells, technologies out of date and irrelevant comments, and will disappear into these elements. But with the right version control system, the repo is permanent — so whoami ?
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“Dedicate your being to God. He is the one to be ultimately relied upon. Those who know of his support are forever free from fear, worry and sorrow. Whatever you do, do it as a dedication to God. This will bring you the tremendous experience of joy and life-freedom forever.”
Give up your personal life and health to your manager. He is the one to be ultimately pleased. Those who ingratiate with the manager are forever free from unfair promotions, almost invisible hikes and challenges of getting your leave approved. Whatever you do, do it as a suck up to your manager. This will bring you the tremendous experience of joy and life-freedom forever.
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“Go now. For there are stand ups to attend and sprint reports to finish.”, said he as he disappeared from the imagination of a bewildered me.
